Warning: Inline Skating Geekdom story

Turning 50 in only a couple of months really hits hard on the “time flies” concept. As I look back at my years so far here on earth, I realize just how much more I could have done with those years. And so, I’m working to do as many things as I want to each and every day. One of the things that has been on my list since I met Mark is to skate in the North Shore (Lake Superior) Inline Skating Marathon with him.

You know, because I’m cool and hip.

And because I’m such a master at rollerblading.

Anyone who had seen me with my boys when they were little playing street hockey would have said so.

At least that’s how ~I~ remember it.

As a matter fact there’s a funny story about that. When I had first met Mark on EHarmony (thank you very much), I was very excited to learn that he liked to skate. I had never really known another man that liked skating and since I had always loved it, I was thrilled to have a partner that would also take part in something that I enjoyed so much.

When he had first been down to my house in Phoenix, he brought his skates and we decided to head out around the neighborhood for a leisurely skate. In my mind, I was a great skater and I fully expected to be better than Mark at skating. I had been roller skating at every birthday skate party my kids were invited to and my youngest had been an avid skater so we went to the rink a lot.

I thought I’d be skating around him in circles.

The first clue that my expectations might be out of wack were Mark’s roller blades. My roller blades were the ones my son had outgrown that I got him from Target. Mark’s were …shall we say… PROFESSIONALLY fitted and made for him. They were SPEED skates, not unlike what you see the pro skaters wear in races. Well, he probably just wanted to have cool looking blades right?

False.

But I kept believing in my personal skating status. We set out for our initial skate and my mindset was one of “I’ll encourage him no matter how bad he is at this.” But it only took about 30 seconds for me to realize that in-line skating wasn’t the talent that I had possessed after all- it was more like rollerskating in an indoor rink to cool music.

And really…was I ~that~ good at the roller rink? Had I been wrong about my own assessment of my talents?

I watched as Mark sailed by -indeed looking like an Olympic speed skater, which compared to my tentative glide, brought on a surge of panic. You know that Elaine from Seinfeld moment of “Am I not as good looking as I think I am?” Not only was he far better than I was at skating but I was also realizing I was terrified. I didn’t remember how to skate at all and PS rollerblading pace is a much faster speed than rollerskating any day.

I began to have visions of wiping out and having scrapes and bruises everywhere or worse yet a broken limb which heretofore I had managed to bypass in life.

And then I was pretty sure after that Mark would just laugh at me and go back to his home in Utah from whence he came – our passionate romance ending with “not only does she look like Pippi Longstocking, she cant even skate like she told me she could.”

So I tried to keep the terror pushed down and just managed to get around the block without falling. Fortunately I survived without much ado, but the fact remained that I was absolutely terrified to skate and I couldn’t understand why. I had always loved skating and it was something that while I wasn’t an expert at, I felt I could hold my own on a recreational level.

I thought it was a fluke and I just needed more practice, but every time we went out skating, I would feel that anxiety and fear set in. I can remember at least three distinct times I sat down and cried like a child because I was so afraid of a specific trail (always involving a hill).

When we first had been dating, Mark had shared that he really wanted to do the North Shore Inline Skating Marathon in Minnesota together. He had skated it many times and had really wanted to be able to share that with me. I’m sure my one uber skating lover that is reading this can relate. It is great to have a partner who skates if you love to skate.

Over the years our schedule (luckily) kept me from being able to even think about doing the race.

Fast forward a few years and now that our wedding has been behind us for almost a year and we are heading up to Minnesota, conveniently right where the race is, for our first anniversary. I thought it was time to actually put my money where my mouth was and train for this race. I knew I could get past the fear, and if nothing else, just get my skills to where they need to be to complete this race. I don’t need to be competitive in time I don’t need to do anything fancy. I just want to go straight for 26 miles until this race ends.

And not die.

So I started watching videos of lots of really good inline skaters. I can see how these videos actually inspire a lot of people to want to skate – they are fun to watch, showcase some serious talent and they are full of great lessons for new and seasoned skaters alike. I will admit they definitely helped my confidence and they are something I turn to when I just want to get my mind in the right frame of reference. (See some of my favorites below.) I feel that seeing these people skate so well really enabled me to see good form, learn new skills and to get a sense of what it feels like to be confident on skates.

And I have actually been doing well! The race is 6 weeks away and I’m starting to feel more confident.

Nevertheless.

Two days ago, I decided it would be a great idea to go skating on our date night to a path down the street from us. It has two sides, one of which is hilly and one of which is REALLY hilly.

I had forgotten that at the end of the flatter side, there is a pretty
pretty
pretty (hearing Larry David in my head)
sizable hill that makes me literally cry thinking about skating down. Mark makes it look like child’s play (which it actually probably is – after all what kid doesn’t love a good hill to skate down.) . Turns out, I don’t like that at all.

I forced Mark to go up and down that hill a couple of times so I could watch his technique. And hey, let’s face it, maybe it would tire him out a little so he would go slower on the way home. I had been feeling pretty confident in my braking so I was practicing slowing down on the top of the decline and was doing okay when I started going a little ~too~ fast for my terrified brain and I ended up off the path in a pile of cactus, having twisted (and possibly breaking) my leg. I was sitting there crying when Mark came back up the hill for the third time to see what had become of me.

Now let’s be clear, I was still at the TOP of the hill. I had barely gone a few yards when I had my wipe out. I was mortified. If I’m this terrified at the top of a hill, what will my brain do to me when I’m really gaining speed?

Boy was I glad I had worn the jeans Mark had made fun of me for wearing! They saved me from getting totally scratched up from the brush. I sat as tears streamed down my face. I knew I had hurt myself and I was immediately sad that now I wouldn’t be able to race. Then I was sad I might actually be hurt and how would I get back to the trailhead?

I felt like a failure.

I felt embarrassed both for falling AND for crying about falling. It was ridiculous. I was sad about being sad about being sad. You know the drill.

But then, I thought, “I fell! And I’m okay!” Even if I did fracture something or have a sprain, I really was okay. The pain was still there, but I got back up on my feet. Sniffling pathetically all the while, I side stepped my way with Mark watching about half way down the hill. I asked him to go on ahead so I did not have the pressure of him watching and then I took half the hill and went down full speed. I was still terrified, but I did it! We skated back to where the car was parked and even though I knew I was hurt and would have to deal with it, I felt good that I hadn’t given up and that I had finished strong!

Today, I’m writing this with ice on my leg. We did go to the orthopedist to make sure my leg wasn’t broken, and indeed, it wasn’t. Which means I have every intention of continuing training and participating in the race.

This may all seem like an insignificant goal, but honestly, it can be applied to anything that seems to loom large and scary. In all seriousness, there are lots of things in life we choose not to do because they seem too scary. We never WANT to fall. But we really can’t learn and get better unless we do.

I’m heading back out there in a few days – I am giving my leg a chance to heal. Taking my vitamins, eating healthy, keeping inflammation low… but I’m actually excited to get back out there and start again. This will be the beginning of my marathon journey! Stay tuned!

Some of my favorite Rollerblading tutorials:

Stopping at high speed:

The Magic Slide:

Good general overview:

Blade on!

This is my weekly forum where I curate what I’ve researched during the past week. I do all the research so you don’t have to! Here is what I found worth sharing this week:

Podcasts:

In honor of our new month March, especially for you poetry readers (and even if you’re not – give it a try), you may really enjoy the podcast “The Daily Poem.” I enjoyed this particular reading of poet laureate Richard Wilbur’s “March.”. If you listen to the previous episode you will get to listen to some Tolkien Easter Eggs!

Along the same vein, a friend sent me this podcast of Mary Oliver reading some of her poems. I love hearing authors read their own poems and since Mary has moved up to the next floor of existence, this is a gift to allow us to keep her with us.

In praise of poetry: One of the reasons I so much love poetry is because a poem is a little snippet of delight that makes me sit and think about whatever emotions/images/themes that the poem stirs. The topics may be something I would not normally consider. As an example, I didn’t really even think about how March began this week. For much of the country – it is still a time of winter with sprinkles of spring. It is a time of hope and renewal mixed with the firm squelching of winter’s efforts holding strong. Yes, I will always have my literary nerd card. I am an English major after all.

SLEEP – Dr. Rhonda Patrick interviewed Matthew Walker on the importance of sleep. His best selling book Why We Sleep is next on my list. Dr. Walker is the director of UC Berkeley’s Center for Human Sleep Science and his discussion with Dr. Rhonda Patrick is nothing less than inspiring to revamp your sleeping habits for just about every reason imaginable. If you need to be sharper at work, feel more connected, get in better shape, look better and stay healthy, this book will teach you why sleep is a non negotiable.

I can’t recommend Dr. Patrick’s podcast more.  She is very technical and conducts long form interviews (many longer than 2 hours), but she has so many world class experts on her show, it is worth sticking with some of the more scientifically challenging parts of the podcasts for us lay people to stay on top of the latest in health and wellness trends.  Her website is at FoundMyFitness.com.

What I’m Reading:

Outside Magazine released their “Trips of the Year” issue. I love this magazine that inspires people to go outside. That is one of the reasons I have a secret (or not so secret) travel blog called Joyful Adventures. This year’s issue did not disappoint and I was pretty excited to see that my home state Arizona was on the list (featured photo this week is from Sedona). It is awesome to live in one of the world’s most beautiful and adventure inspiring places. Of course there is Colorado and Utah – two of my other most traveled states. I was also excited to see that New Zealand made the cut – especially considering we will be honeymooning there in just two months! Make sure you check out the entire list of 33 trips.

Dr. Weil had a great article on procrastination this week. As someone who struggles to get everything on my to do list done in an optimal timeframe, this was helpful.

I was introduced to Jay Campbell by his appearance on the Ben Greenfield Podcast. I found his knowledge on testosterone and Metformin fascinating which prompted me to read the Metabolic Blowtorch Diet this week (twice). I’m now following the advice in that book and working on a feeding/fasting alternating regimen, which I really like because I only have to work through a day of fasting at a time. I think it is a great approach to keep the metabolism going strong while optimizing fat loss. Pay attention to the difference in intermittent fasting times for women vs. men.

 

Also for those of you interested in longevity and anti-aging, you will want to listen to Jay’s take on Metformin. I was happy to discover that my functional medicine doc can prescribe Metformin and we agreed to add it to my regimen in a couple of months since I also just added Thyroid, we want to make sure we note individual results rather than combining things to start. I will be providing my results on everything from the Wiley Protocol, to the Thyroid, and Metformin as I do the analysis. I expect to see body fat reduce and general overall energy and health optimize. Stay tuned.

 

Career:

Last but not least, I was super proud of my oldest who graduated from Web Development code camp at Galvanize this week. I am a huge fan of these code camps because I believe the immersive experience allows students to develop their skills fast and with excellent preparation to move into a junior developer job. Not everyone wants a four year college experience and more and more people are realizing that a four year degree is coupled with crippling debt for a lot of people. Not the best way to start out in life. I really liked the program at Galvanize. If you’re thinking of starting a career in IT, this might be the best value.

 

 

That’s all for this week folks.  Have a great weekend and remember to do something nice for yourself!  I would appreciate your comments below!  (Scroll all the way down)

Here are things I encountered this week that I thought were sharing worthy. Let me know if you check out any of these things and what you think!

Podcasts:

1.  Very cool talk between Tim Ferriss and Tobi Lütke, the CEO of Shopify. If you are entrepreneurial in any way you will want to check this out. I particularly like the concept of “Feedback is a gift.” Of course we don’t always have the benefit of having people in our lives that give feedback in a way we like to hear it, but ultimately, if we look at feedback as a gift for us to become better, then it doesn’t have to be a negative experience. There were also a lot of books recommended that were added to my “to read” list.

2.  I know a lot of women have trouble sleeping as they age – here is a good podcast from an expert on circadian rhythms, Sachin Panda on Bulletproof Radio

3.  Speaking of sleep, here is a great article from Outside with Tim Ferriss’ recommendations for a good night’s sleep.

Honeymoon:

We are preparing our itinerary for our big upcoming honeymoon trip to Fiji and New Zealand. We purchased a package for Fiji, but for New Zealand, we are venturing out on our own so we are trying to figure out what we are going to see with the short week we have there. Here are a few shows I’ve been watching to learn more:

Good article:

Some day I plan on doing the Camino and so any time I see an article on the pilgrimage I take a moment to read it:
https://www.us.mensa.org/read/bulletin/features/pilgrimage-as-a-teaching-tool/

 

This week’s Book:

What is the Whole30® Program?

If you’ve been reading any sort of information on health and wellness, you would be hard pressed not to come across something to do with Whole30. Heck they just got their own salad at Chipotle!

Whole30 was started by Melissa and Dallas Hartwig back in 2009. Melissa is very candid about her life of addiction in her 20’s and then getting into recovery through rehab. When she got out of rehab she sought solace at the gym. Her diet wasn’t the best, however, and when her then husband Dallas suggested they stop eating junk and eat only whole foods she jumped on board. She saw a huge impact in her health and wellness and decided to start helping others achieve the same results.

Over time she grew her following and wrote several books, the first of which, It Starts With Food: Discover the Whole30 and Change Your Life in Unexpected Ways became a New York Times Best Seller in 2012.

Detractors say it is too restrictive…

but personally I feel like there are ways to address the challenges. For example, are your hormones in balance? Very often women heading into perimenopause or menopause have a hard time giving up their glass of wine at the end of day if their hormones are not balanced. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard from someone that giving up alcohol for 30 days just won’t happen. Again, I think there are other issues at play – for example, the holidays would NOT be a good time to undergo a Whole 30 effort. The 30 days has to be at the right time. I also recommend that people go without alcohol for at least a week BEFORE they start the program just to get the confidence that they CAN, in fact, forego that glass (or three) of wine at night. It also allows for the munchies that may follow that first week.

Personally, I found that once I was able to prove to myself that I could “Mind Over Matter” (as my Nana used to say) my cravings, that I could constructively find ways to distract myself and satisfy cravings. For example, my husband and I got into playing some really fun board games during my first Whole 30 run (Catan) which definitely distracted me with something fun that didn’t make me feel like my whole life was coming to an end because I couldn’t “get my drink on” or have that pizza and wings every Friday. I also found creative “mocktails” that I could enjoy at the end of the day like unsweetened cranberry juice, fresh lime with some Perrier or soda water over ice.

The second hardest thing to give up, in my opinion is gluten. Bread is a staple in the western diet. How can that delicious white fluffy goodness be bad for us? Well, look at it this way, it’s Whole 30 not Whole Forever. The idea isn’t that you can’t eat a French Baguette when you are in Paris, it is to feed yourself only the very best in nutrition for 30 days to feel and look better. Developing new habits over that time will help you not just to yo-yo right back after the 30 days.

One thing I really like is that you don’t weigh yourself AT ALL during the 30 days. I realized after a couple of weeks in that weighing myself daily was actually hurting my ability to keep going on whatever nutrition program I was doing in the past because I would have one day where I didn’t lose weight or God Forbid, GAINED weight and I would just lose hope and say “Why am I even bothering” as I opened that Pinot Noir.  Staying away from the scale helps you to keep the focus on feeding yourself healthy, nutritious food, not losing weight.  Losing weight is a side effect of eating the right foods, not the main goal.

Here are the rules of Whole30 from their website:

No Alcohol, Grains, Dairy, Sugar or Artificial Sweetener, Legumes, Carrageenan, MSG, or Sulfites, Junk Food, Baked Goods or “Treats.”

Don’t weigh yourself for the entire 30 days.

You may use Ghee or clarified butter, salt, vinegar, certain beans like green beans, snow peas, and snap peas, some fruit juice and coconut aminos (Bragg’s is my personal favorite.)

I know I just lost about half of my readers just now, but WAIT, you can do this!  I’m highly motivated to help you take control of your health!  There is no reason why you can’t see this through.  That is why I have a special Facebook Support Group just for people like you!  One of the reasons I became a coach was to be that support person a lot of people don’t have to push through.   If you really want to experience some great changes that you haven’t been able to achieve until now, decide to do a round of Whole30 with me.

Think of some of the benefits people have experienced from Whole30:

• lower inflammation,
• lower cholesterol,
• lower blood pressure,
• less brain fog,
• weight loss,
• elimination of join pain
• healing skin issues
• improvement in allergies
• improved gut flora

It isn’t easy going from our processed food lifestyle to cooking whole food dinners and making sure we can adhere when we go out to eat.  But it is becoming easier than ever with restaurants like Chipotle getting on the Whole30 bandwagon.   There are websites chock full of Whole30 recipes and even Whole30 Cookbooks.

Not only will you feel refreshed and healthier, but you will also prove to yourself that you are in charge of your health and wellness.  It is never too late to put your health first.

As a woman approaching her 50s rapidly, I am always interested in the latest information on health and longevity as it applies to me personally as well as my clients. I was aware of bio-identical hormone replacement therapy, specifically from Suzanne Somers books, but hadn’t spent a lot of time studying the specific challenges of menopause specifically until it loomed large in my own life. Now it is front and center. I was turned on to The Wiley Protocol when I listened to the Bulletproof Podcast with TS Wiley, the creator of The Wiley Protocol(How To Have The Hormones of a 20-Year-Old: T.S. Wiley #508). I was particularly intrigued by the overall anti-aging effects TS Wiley spoke of, as well as the general well being that it promotes.

I immersed myself in learning more and immediately purchased TS Wiley’s book on Menopause “Sex, Lies and Menopause.” It was very informative as well as thought provoking. There are many reasons to consider bio-identical hormone replacement therapy, and especially to take charge of your own wellbeing and learn as much as you can. Many women suffer severe symptoms from fluctuating or low hormones. Even if you are not someone who is in Menopause, it is a good idea to learn about the body’s hormones and what they do to keep us healthy.

Aging – as in putting numbers on our birthday cake, doesn’t have to cause us to be debilitated with each year that passes. It is important to know there are so many resources to help keep us feeling good well into our later years. While BHRT isn’t for everyone, it is definitely worth considering and learning about. Check out the podcast and TS Wiley’s books. As for me, I will let you know how it goes!

Resources:

www.thewileyprotocol.com

Sex Lies and Menopause by TS Wiley

Dave Asprey’s Bulletproof Podcast with TS Wiley

Today is the first day of the rest of your life. What a lovely beginning! Wherever you are at in life, a fresh start is always a good thing.

The past may be wonderful or it may be painful, but no matter what you are turning a page and beginning a new adventure! It took me a long time to realize that although there were many trials to get through in life, they threw me into a frenzy of growth and development that it became hard to wish those challenges away. And, if everything was always perfect for us 24×7, how would we ever really appreciate the goodness in our lives?

First things first. Take a moment and think about the things in your life you are grateful for. Even if you feel like you are in a rut or handling some really deep difficulties, look out the window – is it raining? Listen to the rain and enjoy the soothing sound of water falling. Is it sunny? Enjoy the blue sky and warmth of our nearest star.

You are here for a reason and my goal is to help you figure that out, or if you are already certain of that purpose, I want to help you achieve your mission in the world. Do you have a mission statement?

We will work on that during the next few days if you don’t, but here is mine:
“To live each day fully with passion, focus, determination. To give the best of me to the day, to the people I encounter and to my work. To learn something new to better myself because in doing so I better humanity. To pursue joy and doing things that make myself and others happy and fulfilled.

From your mission statement, we will unravel the next steps of how to carry that out with action steps. The plan will unfold over time. You don’t have to have all of the answers. Each day you will do what you can with the time you have available to move the needle forward.

I am so happy you are here and that through working together, you will create a Life Project Plan that will be a blueprint to help you achieve all of your goals. Through this methodology, you will identify what steps you need to take and what it really means for you to achieve happiness and contentment in your life.

A lot of people use the word “success” like it is the end all be all. I really don’t like to apply that as a measure to my life. The measure I believe we should all apply is our personal fulfillment, happiness and contribution to this world. That could involve lots of wealth and physical abundance as a sidebar, but the real truth is that we can be truly happy with or without “stuff.” It is a life well lived, close connections to family and friends, good meals with great conversations and making a difference in the lives of others that gives us a sense of fulfillment.

Welcome to a new day my friend. Over the next 30 days I hope to embark on a journey that compels you to grow and become who you want to be. To have your ULTIMATE life. Throughout our time together I will share tools, techniques and stories that inspire your heart and bring peace and purpose.

To your best!

Enter your name and email to receive a writing prompt each day for the next 30 days:

First Name

Email address:

Back in July of 2015, I was going through a very challenging time.  I actually felt like I had been going through a very challenging time for about 20 years.   Ok that is an exaggeration, but that was where my head was at then.  When you’re a single parent with four kids and there are college expenses and activity expenses  – oh and let’s not forget how expensive it is to feed those kiddos and their friends who are always over – things can feel overwhelming.   I had recently discovered the Jame Altucher podcast and was an avid listener.

I would do a five mile walk in the evenings, listening to my positive audio to keep me going.  One guest in particular had caught my attention – Hal Elrod.  His story was so compelling and he was talking about his book “The Miracle Morning.” Let me tell you that at the time, mornings were anything but a miracle.  They were more like “how many times can I hit the snooze button before I can just barely get everything done in time to get the kids to school and get myself to work?”  Ah those were some fine times.  Do you have a time in your life where you look back and say “I don’t know how I did that?”  Of course you do – we all do.  THIS was one of those times in my life.

Even though my divorce had been final for 6 years, I was still dealing with issues – disagreements, fights, money  – or lack thereof – contributions and I was also discovering that my relationship of three years had been built around lies.  Not my proudest moment.  I thought  – wow I’m just a loser.  I can’t meet a good man to save my life so I think being alone is the way to go, I need to improve my circumstances for my kids – I can’t keep having these misfortunes.  I need to be a good example.

Enter Yo’ Pal Hal.    After listening to the podcast (Podcast here, Write up here I immediately went and got Hal Elrod’s book The Miracle Morning. In this case I wanted the audiobook version because I liked spending my time walking productively – both getting exercise and feeding my brain and spirit.

The concepts were not hard to grasp and the case for starting out my morning in a positive way was compelling. Hal breaks down the steps into an acronym “SAVERS.” This makes it easy to remember each step and to get through them easily. When I changed my mornings, suddenly my days didn’t seem as hectic. Things started to go RIGHT. I felt prepared for my day. I felt good personally and I had a spring in my step.

Almost immediately, I saw my circumstances change. And it wasn’t because of some woo woo luck, it was because I was taking charge of my day and thus my life. I was able to perform better at my job and I was keeping a calm head about my challenges and addressing them one by one.

I was able to dig my way out of my financial hole and start having some money to do more for the kids and even for myself. I grew in my career and was able to takes steps towards my mission in life – which is to be a guide for other single parents who are struggling.

I can only say that The Miracle Morning was one of those pivotal changes I made in my life that caused an incremental growth. Now, Hal Elrod’s book is a great movie. I was able to go to the premier in Sedona, AZ to see it and wow was it inspiring! I highly recommend that you both read the book and see the movie. I know it will inspire you and hopefully it will help you grow and change the way it did for me.

How you start your day can make all the difference. Start your Miracle Morning!